longestnight | [audio] The traps will continue until (his) morale improves

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[audio] The traps will continue until (his) morale improves

[After a while, there's no need for anyone to keep too much of a close eye on Branch, despite the fact he was possibly one of the closest to death by the time they got to the Pole. By the time everyone else is feeling well enough to leave the Infirmary (albeit maybe with a limp in the case of some of them) he's still out but at least finally firmly stable. Breathing easily and far less pale. It's just that the sleep caused by the myth healing has him firmly knocked out for far longer than everyone else as all that extensive poison damage heals up.]

[Jack at least keeps occasionally checking in on him. He'd placed him in a little doll bed and placed that in a little dollhouse. The house is meant to make it so the troll won't just sleepily stumble out and fall right off the table or something before he's fully awake.]

[The problem is he hasn't noticed that one of the Elves noticed him initially tucking Branch away. And said Elf also keeps watching him go in and open up a little doll house. Bingle knows better, he knows he's not allowed in the Infirmary unless he wants to be helpful and has been given specific Infirmary-related instructions....but he also thinks that toy looks so adorable. And!!! Jack keeps playing with it and Jack liking the toy makes it seem even cooler!!! So after one of the times Jack closes up the little dollhouse again, and leaves the Infirmary Bingle jingles his way happily into the Infirmary after he's out of sight to go play with the toy...]

[A short time later, there is a whole lot of screaming. Terrified, Bingle drops what was in his hand, and runs out. Then what Bingle thought was a toy also runs out of the Infirmary and the rest...]

[The rest is the kind of mess that happens when a bunch of upsetting events running consecutively are filtered through a filter of high octane paranoia. Branch doesn't waste time after escaping his would-be murderer. Limping out of the room, he makes his way onto a hustling bustling floor filled with furry artisans. Looking around in awe at the strangeness of his surroundings is how he gets run over by some kind of toy car. Great. Wonderful. The injury jangles his leg even worse and causes it to break open the partially-healed snake bite gouge. But that's not about to slow him down.]

[Some stolen ribbon is tied over the bandage to put more pressure on the injury. (They must have bandaged it because they wanted him to live long enough to clear the poison.) His hair is quietly washed in the as-of-yet unused paintbrush water of a yeti setting up a table to paint toys. Then he smears green and red paint on his body and more bits and bobbles, pieces of ribbon and tinsel and pine are used as camouflage all over his body. The place is littered with garlands and scraps of ribbon and tinsel. It genuinely lets him blend. All he has to do is stop moving and then he looks like all the rest of the detritus and garland on the tables and floors.]

[He blends enough that he manages to limp to one of the windows and see what's waiting for him outside without being seen. The view is devastating and makes him realize he has to change his tack.]

[He figures out the comm devices the hairy guys are making are important by silently watching a yeti test one out, including by using some kind of... listening devices with it? Ones that go in the ears? When the yeti's back is turned, both the larger watch device and the two ear-things are stolen, as is the box and instructions for the ear things. And Branch spends the better part of an hour figuring out what it's all for, how to sync the devices, how to use the mic on the one ear bud, and how the menus are navigated - including how to navigate them by tapping the earbud certain ways without touching the comm watch.]

[Then he looks out on what is to become a battlefield, a place to lay waste to his enemies, and starts to get to work. It takes him the better part of a few hours to prepare, the large space of time between anyone possibly thinking to check on him in the Infirmary. He has to use his hair to do most of the traveling because of the shape his leg is in but he pushes his way through it.]

[Then the first casualties start rolling in. The Elves and the yetis, the most numerous of the Pole's residents and most prone to roaming around, are disproportionately affected. The first trap is tripped by an Elf. Somehow the Elf is successfully netted to the ground in a weighted net made of volleyball netting. A yeti trips a trap that causes a cascade of marbles that causes a whole group of yetis to slip and fall. A snare trap somehow whips someone upside down. Super soakers full of lemon juice are activated by a tripwire to squirt the juice in someone's face as they walk by.]

[The traps are all harmful but not permanently damaging. There are no traps that might make people fall over railings or down stairs. Nothing will permanently scald anyone and even if things cause pain and irritation they don't cause permanent damage. And it's possible to avoid tripping traps, certainly. After all, most of the traps are in the busiest areas of the Pole, and not quieter ones prone to relaxation. There's no point in hunting the hunters if you do it in places where they don't heavily congregate.]

[But for those in the more heavily trap-set areas: visible chaos erupts. The Elves and the yetis are clearly panicking. Then, in explanation, a voice comes over the new comms, in audio only, spoken over the mic of a single Samsung earbud. A few of them might recognize said voice from their time in the Multi-plex or before.]

Yeah, hi, all those traps going off around you? Those are mine and I work fast. I guaran-flipping-tee you there are a whole lot more of them than you think. Pick a random number, then quadruple it, because that's what I did when deciding how many to set. And I'll keep setting more the longer my demands go unmet.

Now I'm sure some of you are thinking "well, I can avoid all the traps." Maybe true for you, but your ugly, pointy-headed little children and the big hairy guys sure seem to be running into them. And wow, they are really freaking out right now.

So we're going to do this my way. If you want it to stop anytime soon, you'll do exactly what I say, when I say it. If you don't do what I say, I will make it worse.

[Branch is about to limp around and be a problem.]

[Yippee-Ki-Yay.]

[ooc: Threadhopping is encouraged. The main negotiations will happen with Miguel playing hostage negotiator, but anyone can talk to Branch. He can't see anything because it's all audio but he'll definitely gloat if he hears someone get trapped while on the comms with him, completely endearing himself to them instantly, I'm sure. All the traps will be inconvenient, annoying, and maybe slightly painful but not cause any genuine risk to life and limb - yet.]

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They'll know where I'm hiding if the tracking thing is real and not just a ruse to draw me out. Something you're making up. They didn't need tracking to find us. We got brought here and walked in on them.

[The logic is pretty sound. All they have to go on is Jack's word for it and Branch hasn't even gotten to listen to Jack's welcome spiel yet. The fact they were just plunked into already existing chaos means the bad guys didn't need to track them to find them.]

You want me to trust you? You already made it pretty clear I don't even register as a person to you. I was just a stuffed toy you thought you could squeeze answers out of. Ones I don't even have.

[The logic is pretty sound there, too.]

Plus there was that cat guy that was stalking me before I started throwing stuff at him, even if he changed his tune later and said he didn't eat things that could talk. And that guy that wanted to put me in his pocket to meet his "friends" [you can hear the air quotes, implying that they're murder accomplices] before we even exchanged names.

[Lots of reasons for him to wonder about people's motives. While Miguel wouldn't have hurt him, who's to say it was off limits to one of the others?]

Why should I believe you?

What are you doing accepting food, then? Take your chances with the cold outside. See how it goes for you.

[ Legitimate hurt or not, Miguel is starting to run out of patience for the twerp. ]

OR - recognize that I'm trying to prevent you from doing something really stupid, with all your little limbs intact and head screwed on straight.

Here's a bonus tip: don't drop dinosaurs on people, and I wont hunt you down and squeeze you like last time.

[Accepting food isn't at all a tacit sign of trust. It's a sign of negotiations going the way he wants. Leverage properly leveraged, forcing them to do what he wants in exchange for a ramping down of chaos. (Or, well, at least not a ramping up.)]

[As for the tough love, that would work for some but Branch, whose idea of kindness is heavily entwined with the empathy his people show even their enemies, is less than swayed by it. He himself has been harsh before, but his mental image of what someone looks like when they're trying to help overwhelmingly involves actual gentleness.]

[More to the point, a lack of empathy has been a hallmark of the big people that regularly murdered the trolls. A total inability to empathize. A total inability, despite recognizing they could talk, think, feel, to actually consider their point of view. Completely ignoring the hurt and horror and terrible fear caused to them, that had to be drowned out by them sticking their fingers in their ears and singing at the top of their lungs.]

[That he can't understand why he'd run from someone in a scary costume, nearly thirty times his size, and then try to fight back to slow him down to have a better chance at escaping, means he's not trying to understand the fear he feels right now.]

[An apology would have de-escalated. Even avoiding an apology itself, saying "I didn't want to scare you, I was disoriented too and was worried about being away from home when something terrible was about to happen" would've de-escalated. An thin excuse, but at least one that wouldn't be hard to understand.]

[The little "bonus tip" just has him seething. The 'Don't this and I won't hunt you down and squeeze you like last time" implies there's a condition where he would. And this is the problem in both of them having tempers.]

[Bonus tip, you suck at negotiating.]

[But Branch doesn't say that out loud. Instead he's quiet for a little while, considering. Even counting it out in his head. One second, two seconds, three seconds - until it feels long enough to match how long it would really take to make a decision.]

[He finally lets out a long and tremulous sigh. And when he talks again, it's hesitant, sounding more anxious than as angry as he feels.]

[It's excellent acting. He thinks he's doing this for survival and of all the trolls in Troll Village, he's probably one of the best at lying, able to mentally and morally tangle with it more easily.]

Okay, fine. Let's say I entertain the idea you're not lying about the tracking thing. What does the anti-tracking thing entail? How many big people would I need to let near me to let it happen? And is there anyone smaller that can do it?

[It's going to be 0 that he lets near him because he's absolutely not going to go but this is a stalling tactic. Knowing that seeming amenable to what Miguel is saying will buy him some time, he starts quietly making his way towards a place he's wanted to go, looking around cautiously as he moves. He's silent as he swings along from object to object with his hair.]

Edited 2023-08-25 09:13 (UTC)

[ when Miguel gets back on the line, he sounds… notably less combative. It appears he has cooled off some, but as a consequence, missed some of the clues that Branch would be scurrying about escalating things. ]

Listen. I talked to Jack. The spell can be done from some distance. So, no one’ll have to touch you or get too close.

They’ll just need to meet you in the same room, somewhere. Like last time.

The rest of the supplies can be packed in there too. You’ll have a way out through a portal.

[ he is expecting another rant of paranoid troll delusion to meet him back. But, it was worth giving it a try. That’s the ideal Spiderperson thing to do. ]

[This is the first that he's actually almost swayed. Branch is trying to be infuriating to force what he wants. It makes sense someone trying to negotiate might, in fact, be infuriated by his actions. And it makes sense that maybe said infuriated guy had a talk with someone and tried to calm down. If this had come just a comment or two ago, he might have at least agreed to a meeting.]

[At a distance. But it feels too late now. He literally just kidnapped a dude and there's a bit of sunk cost going on.]

[And he still can't push himself over the edge into a zone of being willing to even attempt to trust.]

[20 odd years of extreme trauma-based survival instinct are just too strong. He's too on edge. The troll equivalent of adrenaline is lighting up all the worst parts of his brain and none of the people he feels genuinely safe around are here.]

[If Poppy were here, this situation would've been de-escalated five minutes after he woke up.]

[He funnels the uncertainty he's feeling into his tone, knowing it'll help sell it.]

The...the middle of the big work room. That's the only place I'll meet. Because there are hiding places if I need to run.

And they'll has to stay at least out of arm's reach. And I want all the stuff you promised visible and easy to grab. All of it.

Edited 2023-08-26 08:32 (UTC)

I'll see if we have someone that's closer to troll-scale to deliver the medical package. Less offputting for you, right?

[ grumble. If only Lego Peter were here (no offense Peter B.). He was a fantastic agent and wouldn't frighten a little paranoid devil troll.

He keeps that thought in mind as he attempts to be diplomatic. Pretend he is making accomodations for Lego Peter, someone who he actually likes. He wouldn't dream of doing mean things to him! ]

Off-putting? Less terrifying.

[Come on, Miguel, get it right.]

Let me know when things are ready.

[So then he can be an asshole again.]

…Less terrifying. That’s what I meant.

[ Miguel trying very hard to empathize by imagining a world where everyone was Thanatos in Innerspace. Yes, being grabbed would suck without venom to escape with.

A few minutes of discussion later, he responds:]

There’s someone that can help. Not quite your size but, he’s smaller.

Is that amenable enough?

[An annoyed huff.]

If that's the best you can do.

[Yes, that is amenable. Because he knows who.]

You'll send whoever it is. Alone. With all the supplies. Including the...whatever lets people get out of here.

And before you try to negotiate some picky terms or whatever, know this:

One, I totally spent the time I was silent stealing a ton of chili powder from the kitchen, which is now in traps I set that'll be a blast for people to get in their eyes unless I leave you the little map I made of where they are.

And two, I have a captive now. Yeah, turns out one of you big people has a new shrinky power. News to him, too.

Now read the note.

[He holds the mic over to Tim.]

[ The mic picks up a sigh, but not the accompanying eye roll. Tim’s voice sounds calm and assured, with a tone that alternates between reading aloud in class when you hate your teacher and explaining to someone why you’re having the most ridiculous bad day ever. ]

This is Rook.

It really would’ve been better to let me proofread your copy. More people will recognize me under another name, Tim Drake.

I’m now Branch’s captive.

I’m also now about the size of a Star Wars action figure, which is conveniently timed to Branch’s plans but is unrelated. If he had the ability to shrink other people, I wouldn’t be the only one. Please confirm that no one else is smaller than normal and watch where you step.

I’m trapped but I’m being treated well.

There’s cookies, water and doll clothes so presumably we’re in this for hours and not minutes.

He says he won’t hurt me

- and I can confirm I’m unharmed -

But I’ll be stuck in captivity for -

However long it takes me to get bored, really, and I’d like to point out that I once stayed in an air duct for over 20 hours to memorize a six-hour-long laser trip wire sequence, or -

As long as you don’t give into his demands.

I’d like to object on the record to being housed in a Backyard Safari bug house, which doesn’t count as giving my location because this is Santa’s workshop and there are presumably hundreds more.

Edited 2023-08-27 19:04 (UTC)

[ there’s the silence of Miguel staring at his watch for a good 30 seconds. If it was possible to audibly gleam that he was pinching his nose... ]

Pues, le dije. Le dije que el iba a inventar más tonterías....!

[ Tim would surely have enough fluency to recognize the titanic 'I told you so' that Jack was going to get when Miguel hopped off the line. But amazingly, he does not let his temper get the better of him here. Because as much as Branch escalated (needlessly!!!) he still hadn't hurt anyone. And Rook was well enough to banter and make jokes, so. It couldn't be that serious. ]

Fine. Fine. But you're only getting your way out when we see Rook. Same location?

[ Miguel wanted it to get out of the troll's head the thought of running off with hostage in tow, extending this ridiculousness even further! ]

*Well, I told him. I told him that he'd go invent more nonsense!

[It's fine that Tim editorializes. Whatever makes the kidnapping more entertaining for him. Branch doesn't want him to actually be scared or anything, even if he does want it to leave Miguel super irritated. He's more of a threat if he's actually calm and reasonable.]

[Tim's just insurance anyway.]

Same location as discussed.

You have your smaller person come out and do the imaginary charm thing that doesn't actually exist but I'll humor you about it. I'll have Ro - Tim there and visible. [He's made his name preference clear.] You send the medical supplies and...whatever it is that will let me leave. Preferably remotely, because if anyone else besides your appointed tinier person gets within fifty feet - your scale, not mine - I take Tim and run.

When I leave, I leave Tim there, safe and sound and ready to be freed and stop play-acting at being a sparklefly. And the map of chili powder bombs so you can use them to disarm them.

You're on your own for the other traps.

[They're less harmful than chili powder to the eyes.]

Hi yes, tiny guy, this is the boyfriend, so leave this on for a second please so I can talk to Timbits over there?

Hey babe, you okay? Because this shrinky dink thing sure is new.

Is the Smurf actually treating you okay?

[He is absolutely not taking this seriously because Branch has kid's toys of him so like how high could that movie rating even be? E for everyone probably? What's the guy actually going to do when kindergartners are the ones that probably did the Belief investment at ground level? And two, Tim's Tim. He's likely just biding his time and playing the long game to take advantage of the situation.]

Blink once for yes or twice for no, and do it loud enough I can hear your blinks.

[He is joking because how are they not gonna lightly joke over Tim being kidnapped like a glowbug by a Smurf?]

Edited 2023-08-28 10:29 (UTC)

[ Tim does think everyone’s better off if he stays out and tries to keep an eye on Branch’s health and finesse his poor decisions if possible.

At the very least, having a hostage seems to be forcing Branch to think a little more. Slows him down just a titch, because he isn’t a bad person and this is fairly decent care for a kidnapping.

(Really, the most stress is from being a little embarrassed that he’s been publicly babed, boyfriended, and Timbeted in such a short span of time.)

(But he’s kinda not mad about it.) ]

I’m fine.

[ He makes a show of blinking twice, slowly. Sorry, Branch, but even with all the considerations, it’s in Tim’s best interest if Branch believes that someone can hear Tim. ]

There’s no need to send in cavalry.

[ Trying to not have an existential crisis about another set of metahuman powers right now and to think small thoughts. But, well. He’s not going to articulate that on an open feed. ]

Branchy Smurf’s been smurfy. I’m don’t know if he’s ever smurfed before, but he has all the makings of a Smurfy Smurf.

[ He’s … also not taking it very seriously. Tim’s seen enough to semi-trust that Branch means no real harm and is increasingly in over his head.

(It’s not like when the Joker says he won’t hurt you.)

Tim’s patience for shenanigans is actually quite high, and - really, it’s borderline charming. ]

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[audio] The traps will continue until (his) morale improves

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