Fandom's Come Knocking

[branchifer]

Okay, did you guys know people in this world make stuff of some of us? Apparently the yetis make toys of us on their own if none exist but also imitate ones that do exist if kids want them.

[Branch is hopping along a table of merch that is meant to mimic exactly the merch of him in stores. A lot of it is actually bigger than he is. He shows off the dolls with his tiny little wrist comm. They look even weirder at that perspective.]

Now that I know they're not ritual effigies, the toy thing is kind of funny. Weird, but funny.

Look at this. Look.

[He holds up his comm so the camera picks up some absolutely hideous toys.]

Like, who is this guy? I wouldn't even know who this was if it wasn't labeled with my name. Like, some random guy from the village maybe. I've never dressed like that in my life.

[He points the camera at another.]

This one is the closest to actually looking like me and it still has the random skull symbol hair thing. What's up with that? [A pause as his face comes back in view. It screws up in thought.] ...Okay, actually I don't hate it.

[Because even though he's a much happier person than he once was, he's still slightly an edgelord. Just slightly.]

[He looks upward and similar skull designs suddenly appear in his own hair, thanks to his ability to change its color. Maybe that explains why some of the dolls have black hair and some have blue (if manufacturing inconsistencies aren't to blame).]

[(It's actually not but he's not about to explain the subtleties of troll coloration when it comes to emotional state.)]

Seriously, you should check it out, and see if the yetis made stuff based on you. It's hilarious.

[ooc: If none exists IRL, people can make up imaginary merch, though all merch at the Pole would be for kids or teens. The stuff made purely by the yetis would largely be decent-looking and accurate, uglier stuff would be based on designs existing in the game world because well, that's what the kid pointed at in the store. Googling themselves would produce other merch for other demographics, as well as let people find out about any internet fandom. People can feel free to thread hop a lot because the point of this is probably going to be a lot of pointing and laughing.]

Comments

audio

[ninjavampire]

You'll get used to that. What never stops feeling strange is when the Cultists start dressing up like you.

[ Miguel knows what having a weird semi-religious Following is like. He is NOT looking up his fandom. ]

video

[branchifer]

[He googles "cultists." He's so glad someone showed him how to look up information and that he's enough of a cynical skeptic to keen oe some of what he finds in searches is made up nonsense, at least enough to ask someone. This seems real, though.]

[Wow, super depressing. Way to bring down the mood, Miguel.]

What is with your life, man?

[ninjavampire]

Comes with the Spider-Man territory. It’s like being the city mascot.

[ he doesn’t sound that busted up about it. Was it annoying and weird? Yes.

Has he been at this for over a decade? Yes. He’s seen much weirder. ]

[branchifer]

[They have mascots where he's from. Because games and sports.]

Guy dancing around in a weird suit being weird.

Yeah, that sounds like you.

[A pause.]

Seriously, though, why the suit? What is it you even do? Besides blah blah universes blah blah.

[ninjavampire]

Do you know what a corporation is?

[ Branch is a fairy tale creature. He must have only experienced village bakery tier capitalism.

How can he describe Alchemax in comparison to that? ]

[branchifer]

[There are many things he doesn't know but he's googled a few, especially things that commonly came up in things he tried watching on the TV.]

I searched that up the other day when watching one of those plays on the teevee.

It's like a shop or bakery or something, right? Except a lot bigger. They make things or provide a service, but they don't give things away for free, and all they care about is making that money stuff, to the exclusion of everything else, including the well-being of basically everybody.

They were the bad guys in the show.

Sounds super. So glad we don't have those back home.

audio

[lowercase_el]

Yeah, having cults based on you is weird.

[Cults. Plural.]

I mean for me, the second cult was based on my cousin and I just kinda kicked the hornet's nest a bit by showing up in the future and wearing the costume, but still.

[ninjavampire]

[ multiple?? That’s rough, buddy. ]

Being caught up in the adulation is bad enough.

The last thing I need is a group of guys with pipes running in to try and beat up the Vulture.

Re: audio

[millenyal_pink]

You know, it almost feels easier having, uh, inherited a cult membership.

["Inherited" is very clearly a euphemism. For what? She'll get back to you on that.]

Re: audio

[lowercase_el]

I mean, for me, it was just the one.

The other cult was 100% based on me. Dying and saving the world during a crisis where millions of people die and worlds are crashing in the sky and blipping out makes people get super weird about you.

There was also a youth movement but that was less cult-ey. More just aspirational. No rituals trying to revive the dead.

[millenyal_pink]

[Kon what the fuck is your life.]

...I have no response to that. I am genuinely speechless.

["Rituals trying to revive the dead"?????????????]

I think I'd take my weird supernatural doomsday cult any day, no offense.

[mostdangerousbird]

The movements are as bad as the cults. Kids get in over their heads in a very real way. They don’t understand what they’re emulating or asking for.

[lowercase_el]

Like I said, people get super weird about you.

Re: audio

[manofanxiety]

Wait, what?

Re: audio

[lowercase_el]

[Crap crap crap crap.]

[Kon freezes for a second.]

...Our other cousin. Yeah. Did you know you have one of those? She got put in a capsule and reached Earth way after you. You'll meet her later.

Re: audio

[manofanxiety]

I...you know what, we can unpack that part later.

[He may just be a rookie reporter, but he can tell when someone's trying to distract him. Especially when it's that obvious.]

Explain the cult.

[bestbrotherever]

You should have taken advantage of their devotion.

Private; audio

[mostdangerousbird]

I've seen a Loki cult go very, very wrong.

Private; audio

[bestbrotherever]

Ah, but he is a hero, is he not? So his cult should be more benign and helpful.

I suppose you have more details that you intend to share as a warning?

[lowercase_el]

Oh, it's totally a great idea to be someone that can level buildings and let influence and power go to your head. Super healthy mindset to get into.

Listen, man, I've seen multiple alternate timelines where alternate me's let that happen. They weren't pretty.

[bestbrotherever]

You could have helped them correct course while taking advantage of their admiration to accomplish your mission.

video

[bestbrotherever]

Now that is a level of devotion that is novel.

[ninjavampire]

I prefer when the devotion level goes down a few pegs, personally.

[ its weird, loki!! ]

[bestbrotherever]

But would you not be flattered? Or pleased that they are emulating you as a hero?

[ninjavampire]

Emulating me in any way is a terrible idea, though I can't blame them for being excited.